Calendar boy. Game, set and Match.com

I will be quitting the online dating game on the fifteenth of June. It hurts too much, the truth. Chicks don't get me online. I have sent out over a hundred appeals and received nothing but repeals. I am sending out my number and letting the girls know that the balls are in their courts. No takers of my heart. I will wink at all of the cutest ladies in hopes that one will be super stoked. Three days till I admit to meeting my match.
I got a desk calendar when i got the desk job and never used it because i never used my desk. Now i am logging all of my earnings daily and taking out the expenditures. This is how to play the game. When i get up in the morning i think about the entry i'll be making at days end. If i dont want to go to work i think about the calendar. The calendar is my boss and teacher. The calendar is my friend and inspiration. The calendar is my impetus and my brow beater. The calendar is my reminder and my memory.

Haight and Assbury. Hate ease. Mad Hater.

I hate loud stoopid people with hot girlfriends. I hate shingles. I hate that God hates me. I hate women that like loud and disrespectful stoopid dudes. I hate my head scars. I hate reading half a book and not finding it fit to finish. I hate not having it sorted out. I hate fearing failure. I hate failure. I hate lazy people that have it made. I hate that my head scar leaks when i eat something i love. I hate laziness that kills hope. I hate liars that don't get caught out. I hate haters. I hate being awesome and being the only one in my circle. I hate chronic life long nerve pain. I hate that negativity rules. I hate the decisions i have made. I hate that others regret my decisions. I hate losing at blackjack. I hate the black smoke that emits from my tailpipe. I hate that Peacemeal never caught on. I hate that i never had kids. I hate nothing.

Like, stuff i like and stuff.

I like flowers when they're just starting to die. I like watching bugs interact. I like looking at people's reflections when they're looking at mine. I like the way my van runs after its been washed and dried. I like getting cash from strangers. I like wearing clothes that i got a long time ago for cheap. I like the best dollar menus. I like the cool of the pool after contemplating for too long jumping in. I like dollar Tuesdays at the movies. I like the Mandalay Bay from McCarran just as the sun rises. I like my chances. I like falling in love with girls at first contact. I like playing the saving game and winning. I like the way dogs shake the water off of them and run around before getting all dirty again. I like getting calls from people i call to talk to. I like getting off of work and having the next day off if i choose. I like turkey burgers. I like when people say "you're in the wrong business". I like when the wind blows so hard no one can open their eyes for fear of losing sight. I like threatening to have a beer and a shot. I like the view from on high. I like being saved. I like shortcuts. I like being high in the woods. I like gardens. I like not being hooked on smoke. I like the way Parvati is like a million dollar palace on a million dollar lot when i'm asleep. I like being smarter than most people. I like driving like a real pro and having the reality of the perfect record to back me up. I like new porn. I like being a nice guy with a short fuse. I like when other people fight. I like when my shingle pain is so intense my eyes close and my head cocks to the right. I like dancing. I like fantasizing about a happy life, knowing that the fantasy is attainable. I like ideas. I like it when girls fall for me within minutes of meeting me. I like watching a cat clean it'self for the first or last time. I like  I like my job, now. I like reminiscing about the high water marks of my life. I like writing. I like leaving for work. I like waterfalls and lighthouses. I like the way birds are so serious. I like learning stuff and stuff. I like remembering things i shouldn't remember, sometimes. I like knowing how to be a friend that listens. I like second kisses. Like, i like liking.

What i fear.

IFEARS!

What i fear is many. I fear that God really exists and that he is pissed at me. I fear that i am too smart for my own good. I fear that i be stoopid not to dumb down. I fear that i will spend the rest of my life alone. I fear my own past. I fear that no one will ever read my writing. I fear that i will never own another pet because i am not capable of love. I fear that politics is not real. I fear that the decision makers are making bad decisions and that the people that are supposed to say no are too stoopid t know to say it. I fear that i might marry my ex-wife and divorce her again. I fear the bad auto wreck. I fear having to work for someone else forever. I fear fear it'self. I fear trying something new. I fear my van breaking and me having to ride my bike for transportation. I fear my bike breaking. I fear not getting tips from my cab riders. I fear $40 dollar days. I fear the miss pellings. I fear clipping my fingernails too close. I fear bugs crawling into my ears and laying eggs on my brains. I fear losing limbs from stoopid mistakes. Mostly arms.  I fear that God aint done with me yet. I fear the good days are behind me and that i will never again be in a hammock with my sweetie. I fear not writing a book. I fear anonymity. I fear the people i know. I fear my kindness is too debilitating. I fear that my family is mediocre and likes it. I fear rejection from pretty girls. I fear not trying to get pretty girls. I fear paying full price for anything. I fear not needing anyone. I fear my friends is tired of my fears. I fear i don't get it. I fear people fear me. I fear that the predicaments i find myself in are the fault of my friends not liking me. I fear i am out of chances. I fear i fear. I fear losing my voice. I fear riding on the street away from the flow of traffic. I fear getting a ticket for riding on the sidewalk where no people are using it. I fear possums. I fear running out of gas late at night without a gas can. I fear God is a creation of mean people. I fear that i will meet a chick and fall for her then hate her. I fear not owning my own property again. I fear high interest rates. I fear the headaches are something growing in my head. I fear hip replacements. I fear no one will ever understand my shingle pain. I fear meeting someone with shingle pain worse than mine. I fear spilling this hot coffee on my crotch and not getting $800 thousand in cash. I fear not getting my Rizide smogged. I fear that i haven't hooked up my stereo. I fear checking my online dating account. I fear i have to get back to work.

The ex. Koh Phangan. Banglampoo.

I met my wife in Banglampoo, also known as Kaosan Road in Bangkok, Thailand. I was there to blow some dough and get some chicks. My friend from Seattle, Maureen, was teaching English there and was the perfect guide cuz she spoke Thai and was quite cool. I should have tried to hit on her but did not. She might have been the one i married had i have tried :)        I had loads of money from the Hong Kong jobs and nothing but time. I was meant to return to Seattle with $18k. Maureen had a few friends there and we would get together for drinks and meals. It was the 4th of July and one of the girls birthday parties when Tania and i met. We fell for each other quickly and moved in the next day. I got sick the night we met and she took care of me. We were together ever since. That was 1997. We married in 2001 and split in 2004. She was cool sometimes but, and she will agree with this, she tended to pick fights for reasons unknown to me. I did'nt like that about her.  I forgave her many times in hopes that she would change, but no. We had some some great times though. one of the great weeks was spent on Koh Prang Yang in Thai, not long after we met. It was so romantic. We wanted for nothing and the love we forged was it'self forged of love. Damn, she was the last one i truly loved. She goes in for the first of her hip surgeries today, poor girl. Last i spoke with her i could hear the fear in her voice. Not just the fear of the knife but the fear of never having love like she had with me. That kind of love is a rare and valuable thing.

Extra bored. Step away from the collage.

I was going over some of my fotos in order to pick one for a profile shot for a meetup group i will be updating you on in the future and discovered something. I have a type. Somehow the computer saved all of the pics of the gals i had emailed for love. There are way too many. The ladies i took the time out to impress are generally non black, 5'0 to 5'5, pretty and not interested in a guy like me. The gallery is quite telling. In the beginning the girls are all slender, whitish, 5'1 t 5'3, making $75k+ and without children. The latter ladies are taller, poorer, more ethnically diverse and have kids. My standards are changing. Soon i will be reaching out to the tall and fat old black lady who lives in a shoe box.
At the taxi co. there is thing called extra board. That means you walk in and get a cab after all the regulars get theirs. That's what i am these days. Since i quit, i lost my weekends only shift. That's not necessarily a bad thing though, in fact it can be quite the coup. I can take all the days off i want and work all the shifts i need. I don't even have to call in.
I came up with a cool phone application after some taxi driver left his Samsung Galaxy 2 in the cab. I was in my cab after eating breakfast at the Ellis Isle and he knocked on my window. He had an app that showed him exactly where the phone was. To the millimeter. He followed me all over town and just missed me several times. I was really moving and had 15 rides by the time he caught up to me. I had already called the a number to try to find the owner so he knew i wasn't a thief. My idea is to create an app that i sell to two groups; drivers and cab users. Sometimes there are 200 people waiting out in the weather for a ride. Any ride. This can take an hour or more. When you need a ride use the app to get a driver (any one with the driver app) to pick you up at  a certain spot. The driver gets clicks telling him where to go and get a specific fair. Using GPSystems and google maps a price can be pre negotiated and even paid for after certain hoops are jumped through for both. There will be an honor points system, a comment page and an assurance that the transaction will go smoothly. The drivers will pay $60 for three months of usage and the price will go up for newbies and down for trail blazers. The customers will also have a rating system so that if they flake too many times they will be red flagged. This will take the power out of the cab co. and create incomes for millions of drivers.
It's doable.

The puppy lure. Kicks Tart.

I am not beyond using a pooch to get a date. "You wanna walk my dawg?" I saw the cutest Husky pup on clist. He was only nine weeks strong and had the bluest baby eyes. Black and furry is not what i wanted but did i mention how cute this thing is. $60 bucks and he could be mine. I'm thinking more short haired and red. I also saw a ranch style house with a pool and wi-fi for only $400. It's pup friendly and has it's own bathroom. $400!! I was thinking how much better of a deal i could get if i was a couple with a cute puppy. There are some big master suites with pool, patio, rv parking and gads more for only $600 per.
I placed an ad in clist looking for help with my Kickstarter projects. So far no response but it was only a few hours ago. The documentary idea has to do with getting the flotsam collected by homeless, itinerant or otherwise eccentric geniuses and make the scribblings  come to life. Videos, scrapbooks, scratchings and artwork of more miserables are often hiding insights otherwise left un-pondered. Lets bring these treasures into the light. When a person loses nearly everything, whats left is all that is right in their world.